When the End Was Met

my wits end of trying to show her anything was met years and years ago

sometimes I wonder what all this is for
what is the lesson I'm supposed to be learning

and im just not worth it
and all I want is 5 free passes
where a family can feel like a family
or at least not put me through
the most brutal ringer you could
ever.imagine.

im not whining
promise

sometimes when you wonder
an answer comes along
even if a Long Hard Road wasn't what you were looking for
"If nothing else, one day you can look someone straight in the eyes and say:
'But I lived through it. And it made me who I am today.'"
its still an answer.

Seven into the Mist

do you ever get the feeling that you've done everything right?
and all wrong
at the exact same time?

can't figure out who wins
if there is a win
so much done just as it should
and so much missing
which is it?

its almost exactly like looking in my eyes
and saying my name

or is it?
who hasn't got a question
I think you've forgotton the mark

seven into the mist
caps dropped onto the floor
and the result is less than ideal

and i miss you
but i haven't got a clue who 'you' is

had a dream last night
another
this time i saw an owl
a little baby owl
with a broken wing and no hopes of flying

but when i came up to her
she didnt need me after all
and though she fell from a tree
she managed to escape

and i woke up
to bright cool shining sun
coming through the window
urging me out of bed

so its all alright
going to be alright

thats what you're saying
right?

Messages Hurled My Way

The universe is sending me a message.
But I haven't got the key.
All signs have been pointing, pointing right here to me.

Whiskey on ice in bed.
Four tears fell out
But I'm botteling the rest instead.

sunday morning arrests to wednesday afternoon lay offs
how many hours is that?
how many more until the last shoe drops?

my name to my school to where I grew up
flashing alerts
"THANKFULNESS A single grateful thought toward heaven is the most complete prayer. Take care and enjoy and be prosperous... William "
I dont know who he is but he found me
flashing alerts

theres a first for everything
loosing teeth in a dream is one
it startled me and I should have known
flashing alerts
signaled the go


the bubble wrap is in the mail
and its the shortest month of the year

I dont know which is worse
the fear or the feeling
or is that the same thing
just on different frequencies?